Can someone please give me the strength to delete this stupid blog.
A crutch from my past that only furthers the present’s pain.
I’m so confused and I’m so sad and I want to know the answers, and I won’t find them by holding on to stupid things.
These natural barriers of time and seasons are separating me and others from the past and each other. I‘m scared for the people that have foggy barriers and can’t see their past is in front of them and holding them back from moving on.
This post is solely to let you know I’m aware you and your new love read my tumblr everyday over the summer, and as well, you have continued to read it, not everyday as you used to but once every few days, if not, once every few weeks, but moreso when you ran into my friend the weekend of your birthday. This is my apology, as well as my plea in hopes of you understanding I forgive you. I’m sorry to have wasted your time because if you knew your life would be headed in the direction it is in now, then I’m sorry for having exposed to you to what a genuine life could be. I had not had anything to do with you until this last Monday, where I finally gained the courage to look at your Tumblr, and listen to my friends of the facts they have known about you. I’m not sure at our reasons for crossing paths, but I assure you that as you told me I would find someone better, I have. No, not a significant other, but I found someone better within myself since you’ve gone. I’m sorry you seem to think so lowly of yourself that you have decidedly gone into a relationship with someone that you have admitted is not a good person at heart. Perhaps that’s why we never saw eye to eye on much, your heart has been peering through alleyways to find the most corrupt, and selfish heart to connect with yours, so that you can play the victim as you always do. Regrettably, this post may show some of my resentment and anger towards your immediate actions after we stopped speaking, and I apologize for that. I would like to let you know that I will not interfere with your life, and I hope with all my heart your new relationship works out, and it’s not as miserable as your last attempt with her. I will give your relationship a fighting chance and still, if need be where your life is in a desperate last attempt to be saved, I will be there for you. Thank you for treating me the way you did because I was finally able to see my worth after you threw me to the ground and repeatedly kicked me in the mouth for ever trying to bring your worth up with mine. I am almost so grateful at this point I want to call you and let you know how your terrible treatment towards me allowed me to see how much better of a person I am, however, you don’t even deserve to hear the new me. I truly do hope you have a great life and I hope you start to treat yourself better at some point. Some hearts may not be the most genuine, but that does not mean that their mind and emotions should be subjected to abuse. Please look out for yourself and hope to gain the desire to grow, rather than digress with your new choice in partner. This is my final letter and the proof of detachment, which is long past due. I love you on some level through the lies and cheating. We’ll move all the hurt aside to let love sustain our passions, and move up and onward. We are not our losses, we are only the extent to which we love. I wish you only the best.
You’re just lonely and clinging on to what is most convenient. Or maybe it’s just what I want to believe.
That’s all I want to know. I really think you’re just settling cause you’re scared.
It’s really nice that even though I’ve stopped blogging here someone remembered. Thank you so much. :)
too busy to ever blog/think about anything. too busy to care about anyone anymore. luv. however, at the end of the day, fuck each and everyone of you. seriously.
fucking J’s. I FEEL SO BAD. ugh. stop fucking dragging her along, you fucking asshole. SO FRUSTRATED. rutgers w/ tommy bo111 sooon. ya, i’m sleepy. bye niggas.
